Seventeen year old Khalil Jabarin violently murdered Ari Fuld who left a wife and four children on Sunday the 16th of September 2018. Jabarin is now being referred to as “a child” by the Palestinian Authority. While technically he is a minor and his parents say that they informed the Palestinian Authority and Israeli military forces, the parents should still be held accountable because the need to hate and the need to have an enemy is in place by age three. Jabarin learned to hate Jews as he imbibed unconsciously the murderous rage which swirled around him and through him as a little child, all occurring in the home behind closed doors. While it is hard to know what exactly went on, what we can say post-murder is that he held murderous sadistic fantasies that he acted out through the brutal murder. Little do we talk about child rearing practices and the unconscious in the development of the jihadis’ violent mind. This lays the groundwork for neuroscience and cognitive behavior psychology when researching the behavior of the jihadi.
Shame honor cultures unconsciously manufacture violent children as if they were destructive wind-up toys and all before indoctrination or what is patently called brainwashing. The Palestinian shame honor culture like all Arab and non-Arab Muslim cultures are especially brutal in its aggressive violent treatment of its own children. They treat them as objects not as children with real needs and desires. Needs are considered dirty in shame honor cultures and “the dirt”- – their toxic rage, is projected on to us and acted out. In a shame honor culture, one can’t get their needs met in appropriate ways. They have no boundaries so they exploit boundaries that exist. It is palpable as can be seen in Palestinian propaganda, the military parades, and the weaponizing balloon, a simple child’s toy.
All of the aforementioned have long unconscious histories of generations that propelled such perverse doers into perpetuating a communal self-fulfilling destructive fantasy. Khalil harbored a pervasive rage that exceeds murder itself. We see such rage on the Arab street or in Gaza at the border. This is because the lethal ideologies harness the preexisting unconscious sadomasochistic fantasies that have been seething below the surface throughout the child’s development for years. It merely gets triggered by the incitement at a later point. The turning on and off of the incitement faucet has an overlooked, yet critical unconscious dimension that acts as a trigger, making it combustible.
An online comment was posted that the entire village where Jabarin lived, should be razed. The comment alludes to the clichéd phrase – “It takes a village to raise a child.” The razing also alludes to the Israeli military practice of destroying the homes of terrorists.
This practice makes concrete one of the worst curses in Arabic – “May your house be destroyed.” The IDF merely replies in “Palestinese” – the concrete autistic language of their shame honor world in order to send a message that specifically speaks to them. The house embodies the entire paranoid family unit and brings shame and humiliation upon them for wrongdoing. These enmeshed families have no boundaries, hence a lot of sexual abuse, raising personalities that are destructive and raze “things” never assuming responsibility nor apologizing.
The Islamic theology must also change because Jabarin acted out the famous Hadith: “Oh Muslim, oh servant of Allah, there is a Jew behind the tree, come and kill him. . .” This is part of the Palestinians’ reverse world where good is bad and bad is good. Jabarin is one of countless numbers of other Palestinian children who have been “pimped” by their own parents and will continue to be used to murder the Jews until its people admit to and take charge of the problem of hatred before the kids even go to school.
What is to be done with a culture that has completely gone off the rails? We have to stay the course, be strong as Miriam Fuld told her children, maintain boundaries, and pressure the Palestinian community into completely gutting their destructive child rearing practices. The recent withdrawal of U.S. funding for the Palestinian Authority sends such a message. It is ironic too that Israeli Arabs bitterly complain about gun violence in their intracommunal existence yet they separate it out from the violence committed by Jabarin even though it too is inherent in their shame honor world. All these cultures cause the violence and influence one another like a contagion because unchecked aggression breeds aggression and more murder.
One of Golda Meir’s most famous quotes which some say is not verifiable, nevertheless it does get the psychology right: “Peace will come when the Arabs will love their children more than they hate us. Tragically Jabarin reveals how much his parents must have hated him unconsciously even though they may deny it to the end.
Photo credit: Tower.org
Senior Analyst – Psychology of Child Terrorism – Middle East Desk (Israel)